Uncle agony to the rescueeeeeeeeeeeee.

Dear monsieur Ng,

Take this part of you, to be a part of you.
Eventually, they'll be thankful to you.
There is this scale, in which we straddle along the course of our lives.
You might tip it, you might crash it, where perfect alignment will never realise.
Stay on general course, live with it, as long both feet are on it, they will love you for it.
Yes, you hate it, but this is Science.
The Science of being a human.

Forever yours,
The quintessential Singaporean

So here it is.
Does she always appear cool and confident to you? Or conversely, do you sometimes feel like she has more than her share of insecurities?

Most women, no matter how they present themselves to the outside world, have a few nagging insecurities, especially when it comes to dating. Indeed, the dating world can be rough, and while men also have their share of insecurities, they tend to stress about very different things.

The following are just a few of the things that a woman tends to worry about when it comes to dating or being in a relationship.



Her dating insecurities

1- You might not call her after the date.
Following through with what you've promised her is the first step to building a woman's trust. So if you say you are going to call her on Thursday, call her Thursday. If you say Friday, do it. If that's not your style, though, or you'd like to keep a little mystery, just don't be definite about when you'll be calling. It's better than breaking a promise and at least she won't be waiting by the phone on a particular day.

2- You just want to sleep with her.
It's a hard line to walk: If you make a move too soon, she'll think that's all you want. If you wait too long, she'll think you're just interested in her friendship. So the best way to work this is to just be sincere. If you are genuinely interested in pursuing a relationship with her, let her know. From there, she'll give you the signals to let you know when she's ready to get romantic with you.

3- You're dating other women.
It is perfectly acceptable to casually date more than one woman at the same time, as long as you are honest about it. So if you are dating other women, don't lie about it. You don't have to bring it up in conversation, but if she does, be honest. Once you start sleeping together or things seem to take a turn for the serious, she might assume you're exclusive, so it's only fair to let her know if that's not the case.

4- You're not that interested.
Even the most confident woman sometimes needs a little affirmation that you're interested in her. You could let her know by telling her outright or through a gesture, such as sending her flowers or calling her in the middle of the day, just a little hint to let her know that she's special to you.

her relationship insecurities

5- You're cheating on her.
Ask yourself the following question: Why is she insecure that I'm going to cheat on her? Have you given her a reason by cheating in the past? If that's the case, I'd be hard-pressed to say that she's being irrational. If that's not the case, however, you have to discuss the issue head on and let her know that you are committed and have no intention of cheating.

6- She's not satisfying you in bed.
Just like men, women have a lot of performance anxiety in the bedroom. So if things are going well in that department, make sure to let her know. If not, however, be sure to address the issue in the most sensitive manner possible. For example, don't tell her, "I don't like the way you..." Instead, tell her, "Let's try it this way..." JAJAJAJAJA.


7- You're not attracted to her anymore.
Just because you are a few years into a relationship, it doesn't mean that she doesn't need reassurance anymore. In fact, because you are a few years into a relationship, you have to work extra hard to let her know that you still find her attractive. Remember to compliment her and let her know that she still has it. This will reap rewards for you too, it'll help keep your romance alive.


8- Another woman is stealing your attention.
Do you flirt with other women in front of her? If you do this consistently, I don't blame her for feeling insecure in this department. There is nothing wrong with harmless flirting, but when you're with her, devote all your attention to her. You can flirt on your own time.

secure her

Yes, the world of dating is harsh. But with a little foresight and sincerity, you can make her feel infinitely more secure, both about your relationship and about herself. You should now be in a much better position to boost her sinking ego. So if you genuinely care about her, isn't it worth the extra effort?

Swee anot? I write aunty agony style for you lei.